Social Skills: Building Friendships: Friendly Conversations

The following activity helps participants understand how the four personality styles regard friendship by working with a partner of a different color to identify their differing perceptions.


friendship, pairs, conversation, best friend, personality styles


Pairs converse to reflect their understanding of each other’s personality style. The class discusses the importance of understanding a friend’s personality.


The participants will understand how the four personality styles regard friendship.


20 minutes




Step 1: Divide the participants into pairs, preferably of different colors.

Step 2: Ask each pair to discuss with each other how their own personality style feels about friends and friendships.

Step 3: After a few minutes of discussion, invite each pair to report to the class their findings. Invite a “scribe” to record the answers so everyone can see them. Possible answers include:

  • Blues
    • Need to have friends who can get together often.
    • Frequently talk with friends on the phone.
    • Like to share experiences and feelings with friends.
    • Require a lot out of a relationship.
  • Golds
    • Prefer “social functions” over “wild parties.”
    • Enjoy planned, predictable get-togethers.
    • Are quickly worn down by friends who are nontraditional, risk takers, or nonconformists.
    • Like friends who contribute to their overall goals.
  • Greens
    • Have only one or two friends
    • Will get together to share interests or activities.
    • Don’t chit-chat or shoot-the-breeze with friends.
    • Like friends who are logical and independent.
    • Prefer friends who control their thoughts, actions and emotions.
  • Oranges
    • Like friends who are adventurous, spontaneous, and like action.
    • Don’t want friends who get all hung up over little things or say “We can’t do this because we’ll get into trouble.”
    • Choose friends who bring something concrete to the relationship. For example, money, toys, cars, sports equipment, etc.
    • Have lots of people who want to be their friends.